The Blibbering Humdingers - Natural 20

      [Verse 1]
Am                        G     
 We were surrounded by an army of undead 
Am                        Em    
 Our cleric down to minus five 
Am                        G     
 A rabid hobgoblin gnawed off the fighter’s head
C                                    E  
 But we knew with luck that we could survive 

[Chorus]
        A       
Natural 20 
A                           D                          
I can move mountains. I can swim across the sea 
        A                                 E
in full armor and fight off a horde of zombies 
        A       
Natural 20 
A                         D     
I can slay dragons with a short sword and a sling. 
        A  E        Am  
Natural 20 is all I need. 

[Verse 2]
Am                      G       
 A portal opened, and unleashed the fiends of Hell 
Am                       Em     
 A balrog looking mighty pissed 
Am                           G  
 We tried to banish him, but couldn’t work the spell 
C                                  E    
 We’ll have fight. I hope we don’t miss! 

[Chorus]
        A       
Natural 20 
A                           D                          
I can move mountains. I can swim across the sea 
        A                                 E
in full armor and fight off a horde of zombies 
        A       
Natural 20 
A                         D     
I can slay dragons with a short sword and a sling. 
        A  E        Am  
Natural 20 is all I need. 

[Bridge]
    Dm                                       C  
And after the battle we went to the Inn to relax a while 
   F                                                C   
We spent all our treasure on gambling and women and booze 
   Cm                                                             Bb    
My dwarf made a pass at the barmaid, we think that she might have smiled 
        Bbm                                               F     
But the Halfling had too much to drink and threw up on my shoes. 

[Spoken Bridge] 
N.C.
Player: So really, I’m going to try to ask out the barmaid. 
N.C.
DM: Uhm Okay, make a charisma check. What’s your bonus? 
N.C.
Player: I don’t have a charisma bonus. I mean, nobody puts points into charisma 
 unless they’re a sorcerer or a bard. That’s just a lame stat! 
N.C.
DM: Okay, well, make your roll. You’re at a minus 2 because of the Halfling vomit. 
N.C.
Both: …sweet!

[Chorus 2]
        A       
Natural 20 
A                    D                                 
I can be charming. I can get my drinks for free. 
          A                                E
I wink at wenches and pick up a barmaid or three. 
        A       
Natural 20 
A                          D    
take down beholders with a toothpick and some string 
        A  E        A    E 
Natural 20 is all I need. 

[Chorus]
        A       
Natural 20 
A                           D                          
I can move mountains. I can swim across the sea 
        A                                 E
in full armor and fight off a horde of zombies 
        A       
Natural 20 
A                         D     
I can slay dragons with a short sword and a sling. 
        A  E        C  A        
Natural 20 is all I need.